After all these years working with children in the clinic with their learning challenges, I am happy to say that I can still end a session with tears of excitement and happiness. I can still attach myself to that little girl deep down inside of myself that so needed and wanted encouragement but always had the feeling that “I was only a girl” and not really important to be way up there in class with the rest of the boys.  The most I was given by my teachers was “You can do better!”  But no-one showed me how

I tried….goodness I tried, but as hard as I tried, nothing moved one millimeter from that place that I was at.  My mission in life seems to help others “get there” and what a wonderful feeling it is when I see that smile of victory on their faces.

Claire [fictitious name], 15 years, loved reading.  What did she come to me for?  It was not clear at the beginning but I know that there is always a reason for a parent bringing a child.  I felt a lot of suspicion coming from Claire.  I didn’t feel that she was open to me or my teaching.  I knew that I had to win her trust before we could do much more. We spoke a lot about the current book she was reading. “Harry Potter”.  Every time she came back and I asked about her reading she was reading the same book.  “But I thought you said you had finished reading it?”  I said.

“I have”, she answered, “but I love the book and read it again and again.”

I was beginning to get suspicious.  “And each time you enjoy  it anew?”

“Each time is like the first time and I enjoy it tremendously.”

My hand reached out to a book on the bookcase which seemed to be calling out to me “take me!!  take me!!” It was not a book that I would have thought of for Claire.  Nevertheless, I trust these inner feelings of mine.  She started reading and read faster than an express train.  I did not gather one bit of information from this kind of reading.

“Stop,” I said, ” when you read like that there is no way that I can follow what is going on.  Can you?  Do you remember what you read?”

“Of course I can!” she answered indignantly.

When asked to give a summary of what she had read, she could recall very little of the information.  I did not say anything but just asked her for my own understanding and memory  to read it again – sentence by sentence.

“How would you describe  what the boy meant when he said that he has little boxes in his head?”

 She explained carefully to me that it meant that he has thoughts of this and that and then she got up from the chair and very softly said: “That is why I cannot recall what I read – I too have many boxes in my head!!!”

Silently, I thanked my hand for reaching out for the exact book that was needed to help solve our problem.

And it was the end of our session!!  I wanted to scream!  How could we end the session at this important moment!!  We had got to the essential of it all !!  but just then, the doorbell rang and with all the confidence I could gather I said: “Claire, that was such an important thing that you shared with me, thank you and we will talk about it next week.

Next session seemed as if we had both eagerly awaited for its arrival.

She sat down and without much ado started opening up those little boxes.  I was aghast at hearing “each box’ which mostly had to do with the teachers and the way they related to her.  Now, what to do?  If I was a psychologist this would have been the beginning of a series of ‘sessions’.  But we had no time for this and I was not a psychologist.  I then asked her to start writing positive affirmations about herself. Positive affirmations that she was a worthy human being.  Statements of how she would not allow her teachers to cause her sleepless nights.  She wrote 15 affirmations.  She read them aloud time after time until I could hear in her voice that she believed in what she was saying and was convinced of her own truth.

Now take the book and read, I asked her.

She read.  She read so much slower without me telling her to take note of her speed.  She could then recall 90% of it.  She looked at me and said

: “My reading came out slower but I could follow everything and there were no boxes in my brain to disturb the understanding!”

Hallelujah!!  Not only had we helped her reading and understanding but even more important was her self-esteem

AND THE SMILE ON HER FACE SAID IT ALL!!