May 2, 2016 | Blog
Omri, now at the end of second grade, and his parents had traveled more than an hour to get to the clinic. I had been forwarded the assessment that had been done before entering school.
It was a long document. Basically spelling out that he would have problems with reading and writing at school but there was no need to worry about his maths .
Omri came to because he was not coping with maths!!
Am not sure why, but when he came into the clinic the first thing that I noticed was that this kid didn’t seem to have had it easy but on the other hand he looked like a fighter. It had something to do with the way he walked into the clinic and looked me straight in the eye and said “will you help me?” Not, can you? But will you?
There was something going on with his breathing and while we were working he would every now and then take extra deep breathes, with a lot of noise, as if he was in desperate need of air.
“Omri, I find it wonderful, the way you understand when you need to breathe more and supply your body and brain with the oxygen it needs.”
He looked at me, almost with tears in his eyes: “you say that, but my teacher gets angry when I do it and the kids in the class laugh at me!!”
That was the connecting moment for us. He knew that I was on in his side. He had at long last found someone who understood this basic need of his – a simple need for a bigger supply of oxygen as he was not getting enough with his shallow breathing. And so we stopped all the cognitive work and did breathing exercises. Exercises that would start getting him to use those narrow nostrils differently. And that was given to him as homework. He was really amused at what he was given – twice a day and if he could manage three times , that would even be better. He did them religiously and his breathing became more of a natural automatic slow deeper breathing.
We then talked about his arithmetic problems and he told me that sometimes he knew the answers and sometimes he didn’t and when he couldn’t get them immediately,it would drive him crazy and he felt a lot of anger inside of his stomach and when he felt like that he lost his ability to think. One wonders why pay so much money for assessing when this kid was brilliant in telling what was happening to him. What a pleasure, a student in second grade, who was so aware of himself and his body! And so we worked on anger and I showed him some acupressure points that he could press on his hand when he felt angry. We spoke about how our brain could not think when the body was busy with being annoyed. He was amazing – he could so connect to this, as if I was retelling his own personal story – which I was. So we got rid of anger and anxiety and started with subject matter. It is easy to work with kids like Omri once all the other cobwebs are pushed aside. I suspected that he did not own efficient strategies for doing things – some things he knew by heart and could only get to them if his body was calm, other things made him feel stupid and then this whole circle of things would happen : he would get angry, he would start his heavy breathing, the teacher would comment, the kids would laugh and he felt like an insulted wreck!!
He was working at his sums in a long, tedious, tiring and certainly no fun way. We started on ‘how to work out answers to a question using different methods. We laughed a lot and it was great. I would show him that the same thing could be done in a long and complicated way and also in a simple and quick method and he could choose the way he thought would be easiest for him. I made it very clear that I was not interested in the answers, I was interested in the method. And so he had to explain to me the method before he did each exercise and why. This was something new for him. He always concentrated on answers before and here I was saying -I don’t even want to know the answer, I want to know the way your mind is thinking. We parted great friends and looking forward to seeing each other the next session.
One of the things that I do when dealing with arithmetic problems is to ask the student to write 3 addition and 3 subtraction exercises. I then note the things they write. Omri did not venture further than what he knew for certain – easy things , one plus two. Not even adventurous enough or brave enough to write 10 plus 20 which other kids would do, just to show me that they really know!! Very cautious and aware of his difficulties and wanting to show me his successes. So we will move along slowly but surely and build up his confidence at his own pace and make sure that he understands what he is doing.
Two weeks later he arrived again. He ran up the stairs, his hair brushed, he was clean, showered and one could feel his eagerness to succeed….what fun!! i was curious to check whether he had remembered the things that he had learnt at the first session. We first did brain gym exercises, calmed our bodies, drank water and I could hear how much easier his breathing was. He did not have to take in one deep breathe all the time.
Well…not much to write…..Omri remembered everything that he had learnt. With great joy and a huge smile he told me the method before getting down to do the exercise. HIS FACE!!!!! what a picture of a happy little boy. I then showed him that if he could do 24+4 he could do 124+4 AND EVEN 1024+4…HE WAS WILD WITH DELIGHT. No one else in my class can do that, but I CAN!!! There was no going back – he was happy and excited and motivated and he just worked and worked and succeeded more and more… and it was fun – and then the lesson was over. Already? he said, “that was so quick!!” He hopped, jumped and almost flew down the steps with a big smile and a big thank you.
He is on his way and the barrier of arithmetic has been cut – … the assessment was right after all! We worked together during the summer holidays so that he could get himself up to standard – learn the things that he should have learnt and given a footing into the following years material.
Omri has learnt some very basic important skills for his future learning: *to breathe *to calm his system down *to think about strategies and not answers
Apr 24, 2016 | Blog
Do you think you can help my child? Again and again I hear this question and each time I tremble anew and wonder if i can. Do I know the answer to that question? I know that the solution will not come from any textbook and so where do I find the answers? By learning to be a hunter. by looking and listening very carefully.The answers are there in the room,in the body of the child. The body has the secret and I have to wait, watch every move, listen to every word and try to interpret the language of the being before me.
D is in the last year at school and somehow managed to negotiate the system with very little reading and writing. He has had endless help and tutoring but remained dependent on others for these basic skills.
And there he was that one morning…a beautiful human being. If I could see auras I would have seen something magnificent, I am sure. I could only sense the strength of this young man, his large presence and the energy surrounding him
He sat on the chair telling me about himself and the way he manages his schoolwork, without any feeling that he was less that any one else. i could imagine all the girls in his class wanting to read and write for him. He didn’t sit still for one minute and I was amazed to hear that he was on Ritalin.
“So how are you when you don’t take Ritalin?” I asked.
“I am actually two people – one with Ritalin and a different one, without. I have friends that like me with and others that like me without, but I am willing to come next week without, if you like so you can meet the other me?”
I was curious to see what his body would tell me without Ritalin. In my head I was panning to teach him reading through moving the page. Thinking that perhaps if the words would move, then the body would be still. I checked basic skills – he was reading at a grade two level and was fascinated how one can actually manage so well in this world without the ability to read. He goes to an arts school and is a talented artist.
The next week he came without Ritalin. We first did brain gym – physical exercises to get his right and left hemispheres working together and also to relax his body . He sat on the chair, there was no movement, he was very quiet and calm. I put a book in front of him and noticed that the shadows on the page, coming through the windows from the sun, disturbed him. “Let’s change places,” I suggested.
“good idea, the sunlight really disturbs me!” He stood by my side of the table and then asked:
“Should I stand up and read or sit down?”
My immediate inner reaction was to say “of course sit down!’ but then, I thought to myself that that was a strange question – no one has ever asked that before. So perhaps if he was asking such a question he was also giving me the answer.
“Stand and see what happens?”
His reading amazed me – and as always when this happens, I find myself looking for a tissue to wipe the tears away.
When he stopped I quietly asked “how do you feel?’
“I actually read for the first time in my life. Only now I understand what real reading is!”
I understood that his reading was connected to the angle of his eyes – his eyes seemed to click in unison with his brain when he looked at a book only at a certain angle .
Now was detective time. I asked him endless question. He said that he had discovered that if he really needed to read something for himself he would lie on his back and put the book on his stomach and find a certain spot which made things clearer for him…the same angle as standing at the table. Wow!! so where do answers come from? from listening, from being open to doing things differently?
Now of course the big question was how to get D reading while sitting. We started on a series of eye exercises, rubbing acupuncture points and it took quite a few sessions before those eyes started working together and clicking into the brain while reading sitting down The big thing was of course for D to notice when his reading falters and to stop and do exercises. The responsibility was now on him…not on the Ritalin, not on an assessment to say that he cannot read and someone else should do it for him,but to find what he needs to do so that he can read fluently.
D was now reading. One cannot say that he is ‘a reader’ and that he automatically will take a book in his hand and read at every opportunity. Reading still translates in his mind as work and he has to remind himself that this is no longer so, that if he wants to he can.
The next part of his story was when he decided that even though it was his last year at school he would really like to get himself off the Ritalin. Ad so we tried different combinations of omega-3 supplements together with Australian flower remedies.
He managed to get rid of his Ritalin need and said that not one teacher noticed that he wasn’t taking it…before teachers would immediately notice when he had forgotten his pill. His remark was “I now feel myself – i am no longer two people – I am one person and that is me!”
One of the most exciting moments for him was when he was called up for pre-army recruitment and had to deal with pages of questions. He was ecstatic that he wasn’t the last one to hand in his papers and even more so when he was accepted to a very elite unit.
And so the answers come sometimes just by chance. This time it came from a ray of sunshine falling on the page and may that ray follow D all his life and show him the way.
Apr 16, 2016 | Blog
He called and sounded desperate. “I am dyslexic! Have heard that you teach reading and will tell my story when I meet you. Can you help me?”
Never sure how to answer this question I answered with.”When do you want to come?”He must have been in such despair about it all that he said he would like to come the next evening. It was more than an hour drive for him. It was winter and one of the stormiest nights that I can remember for a long time and was convinced that there would be a call of cancellation. But no, he arrived.He blurted out his emotional story that he was in a relationship with a girl who loved reading . He found no pleasure in this and felt that it was causing some tension between the two of them and desperately needed to deal with what he was assessed as at school ,”learning disabled” . I checked him and thought to myself “ok, so he does have problems with reading. But what do I do now!!?? I cannot send him home with a diagnose of “dyslexia”, he has that already for many years. H e needs to deal with it. What do I do?. And on top of it all he traveled in this terrible stormy weather to be helped. I cannot send him back without some sort of hope! But what can I do? Like a mantra this sentence went on and on in my brain. What can I do? He is no longer a schoolkid that has to be taught basics. He has that. How can I help. Thunder and lightening in the background and my head felt just as stormy and I knew that I dare not send him home empty handed. Besides teaching children I also did shiatsu and massage. To help me think of a solution I suggested that I wanted to try something very different with him, if he agreed. He was willing for anything. So we went down to the massage room. Before I started treating him my eye rested on a book that was lying on the floor and it lit up something in my brain. I am learning that nothing is chance, that book was there yesterday when I treated someone and yet i did not see it and now it seemed to light up as if it was the real focus of everything..I asked him to read a passage from it. After one sentence he stopped and said that he doesn’t understand any of the words and couldn’t continue with the reading.”that’s fine, I said, no problem.” With the background music of thunderous storms and rain I massaged mainly his neck, shoulder and head area while slowly calming myself down within myself and started wondering whether what I was doing would help him as well as myself. After about 20 minutes I became curious and something inside of me said ‘stop! check his reading. I asked him to pick up the book that he read before and continue from where he had left off. Miracles of miracles. He took the book and started reading as if there was absolutely no problem. I couldn’t stop him.
The tears were running down my cheeks and he didn’t want to stop in case the magic would wear off and he just went on and on at a frightening speed.
That Saturday I received an excited phone call: “I could read the newspapers!! It was such fun!! I can read!!! I can read!!! I CAN READ!”
This opened a whole new world and thinking for me. How come? Will it last? Is this the secret of success? Do all teachers of reading problems now learn to do massage?
What seemed very clear to me was that there was a whole world out there which belonged to the world of “a different way of learning” and this story led me to my journey of searching for different solutions. That evening when my brother called to ask if I wanted to join him and go to Singapore to do a course in Chinese medicine, there was no hesitation on my part. I Knew that I was been given a ‘Present” and a part in my jigsaw puzzle in my search of ‘other ways’.
Apr 11, 2016 | Blog
There was absolutely no question of whom to invite to take photographs for the blog. The talented photographer is
Noam Rivkinfenton and I thank you Noam for all the years that we spent together and taught each other so much.
Noam is/was one of those so called “learning disabled’ students who is now grownup, talented in his field, independent and making
a name for himself and can be very very proud of his achievements indeed.
He walked in with his camera slung over his neck and a huge smile of recognition of the place. “Wow!, its such a wonderful feeling to see all this again”, he said,
and ran to the room where he used to sit. I just watched the whole scene with a tear dangling at the corner of my eye. He sat down at the table with a look of satisfaction, as if
he had eaten all the food put before him and said.:”the scratches that I scratched into the desk are still here….I left a mark!”
At the end of the day, I put myself down on the “other side of the desk” and for the first time in all these years, I noticed all the lines and scratches in the wood and
a feeling of excitement came over me. How many of those wonderful young people have left a sign on my table and have journeyed out to the
world and made a huge success.
Thank you Noam for the pictures and reminding me of all those that have made a mark on my soul.
Feb 2, 2016 | Blog
“You can do better.” This sentence rings in my brain over and over again.
Something that I was told endless times and all my school life, I could never understand what the teachers meant. I tried and tried and tried but nothing ever changed. I was told by my parents to try and I did, but no one believed me. And then I discovered the world of sports…the more I practiced and tried, the better I became and very soon I was bringing home medals and some sort of feeling of achievement …..at long last.
I wondered as a child, how come that when I practice on the sports field I succeed but when I try to improve my grades, I just cannot.
At the age of 35, a mother of 4, I decided to study. What could I study? Of course there were no choices for me except to become a sports teacher. Which I did.
It was the most boring thing that I did in my life –standing with a whistle on the sports field trying to get kids to do the things that the educational department decided that they should be doing. So I moved over to special ed school and my days became more interesting. I became more and more creative and started connecting the body and cognitive ability. This was the beginning of mind and body connection for me and the search of how to improve cognitively and perhaps even the search of how to help children “do more” and succeed.
Today I help the child inside of me to succeed. Every person that I help is that child, is that memory of “trying hard and not succeeding”.
When I hear teachers say “he has to try harder and he will succeed”. My answer is always “teach him how to try harder….these are empty words for a child..they mean nothing.” And most teachers get stuck on this one –they too don’t know how the child must “try harder”.
That is what I try and do….teach each individual how to try harder and how to succeed and each person is different and each pupil is my teacher –making me look into the situation and try and find a new and creative solution.
